Bowden Tries to Out-Ornery Paterno

Bowden v Paterno 

The two septuagenarians have been doggedly battling each other for recruits, wins, and national titles for close to 2 decades, while patting each other’s calcium-depleted backs along the way. They’ve each won a bowl game against the other, and they entered the College Football Hall of Fame within a year of each other. And although both declare publicly that there is no bad blood between them, many speculate privately that their personal rivalry approaches that of Burr-Hamilton. (Hence the puddle depth of Microsoft Paint skill depicted above.)

So Bobby “Aw-Shucks Dadgummit Damn Ebays” Bowden isn’t about to let Joe “Library Funding Brain Eating” Paterno get a leg up in anything, especially in the orneriness department. After word got out that Paterno was requiring his entire team to clean Beaver Stadium after home games, due to the off-field altercation of a few Nittany Lions, Bowden got to work. Despite FSU’s complete absence in the Fulmer Cup for 2 straight seasons, a fact that has us weirded out beyond belief, Bowden has charged his team with cleaning up every athletic complex on the FSU campus, every day.

And he didn’t stop there. After new returning assistant coach Chuck Amato told him about the conditions at NC State’s Carter-Finley Stadium, Bowden offered up the services of his team at the 4 ACC stadiums the Noles will be visiting this fall. And, in order to preempt any returning salvo from Paterno, Bowden went so far as to order his team to clean the infield after every Triple Crown Race. Which, after events like the one depicted below, looks none too fun.

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